dearest logan, meg, kate, Mom, family gang and friends,
it is friday morning.. the sun was up.. disappeared under rain clouds and is now back again.. my heart is torn apart and i still have a week to go... pulled one way and the other .. tugging... i am not worried about the babies.. for they are in great care .. but the boys ..well.. edy, my cha cha amigo, fifteen, small in stature..5feet maybe... leaves the orphange in december.. to where?? the street.. doing what? maybe being the caller on the combi (bus) .. to live where? no se.. this is one boy.
the others... they are not in a bad place at this moment. the food is ok. they are friends and a big family .. of sorts... most of the time their clothes are fairly clean.. they have regular showers with warm water ... by march they will all be in school. learning english might break the cycle with a few connections somewhere...
yesterday. no bingo today. daniella , another volunteer brought punch out houses to build and it was glorious.
Gabriel, my student, about 11.. the little rangatang of two months ago, does not know his numbers... playing bingo has made clear where these boys are in levels of understanding and well, my little gabriel just puts the rocks somewhere on the card and so we have been working on numbers 1 through 25. nose to the paper he works away..and we are both happy...the first day we did this i loaned him my glasses .. nose to the paper has to mean something.. then he tried on my magnifying glasses while Jean Pool did a photo shoot. moments together. tamed by loving. his nose is runny. his ear is still sore. his eyes dance with mischief and his pockets are full of stuff.. who knows what... a great little boy.
when i left yesterday i glanced around... ultimate day?? not yet.. we have one week left.. no .. no .. no.. it´s ok it is only thursday.
along the wall small groups gather..the breaking apart of fourty... with their favorite friends.. some brothers.. saturday i will shop for a new bingo game and some more treats... what do you want.. red pens, fingernail clippers, blue and black pens too.. combs.. shampoo.. .. surely there will be some great goodies...
what has changed? for me everything.. my heart is strong and weak at the same time. i am here. there is a patch of sky colorado blue. the mountains rest in the distance holding cusco lovingly on its tummy ...there are great moments of warm....
at the babies it is peaceful. soothing music fills the room and mostly the babies are happy. the have grown in the five weeks i have been here.. how can that be ... time going so fast .. but they tell the story. their cheeks are full, smiles and noises escape as our eyes meet, their and their bodies solid.. hardly able to bend in all the layers that they have on.. Paulo cannot drink fast enough and Ayde´s eyes roll up with the pleasure of warm leche.. Alex spends his days with the gordos..(next group up) because he can sit up and the little girl with the pig tails is there too. the intensive care baby is somewhere else... no se and so the numbers are down and it is much easier to share time..
yesterday the nurse and i learned exchanged words in spanish and english and had we had good laugh trying to explain the significance or ¨like¨ to her.. other words were simple like ..sick, heavy, light, poopee pants.. but to get the idea of a emotion, and a comparison.. and looks like... it is going to rain.. took a little more work.. in the end i gave her my dictionary and i will continue the lessons next wednesday.. there is no way i am stopping working here. one week to go.
i am myself with the babies and time is good here. it feels like that come down at the end of a busy day when i can simply sit, hold warm bodies and kiss lovely little cheeks. with the music it is somewhat like meditation and outside the mountains make me remember where i am. the world stops and life is important. this is easy work .. in the sense of good for the soul.
here are some pictures for you.
the boy in the learning numbers series pictures is Gabriel with me .. photo shoot by Jean Pool.
the single shot is Edy.. my cha cha student .. the one going to the streets in December.
the babies are ; new baby Pamela.. who was dropped off at a church two weeks ago.. the one wailing with bare legs delivered to us suppertime one friday nite.. she is growning like a weed, as dad would say, and she is beautiful!! of the babies she takes the absolute longest to eat.. perhaps she needs more holding time to grow.. and she is getting it.
the little chubby one is Paulo and he is the happiest little runt! no, he is not a runt. he is getting wonderfully plump and an armful to rock..and jiggle.. he is the one who does most of the talking of the babies and he entertains me as much as i entertain him
i love them all and know they are in a very good place.
today i have a cold but am heading out with my friend Hannah, (18 and almost fluent in spanish from usa) and we are going to visit a bruha (sp?) a fortune teller with her spanish teacher and a few other students. this is at 10;30 and should be cool.. the teacher will be our interpreter and i am sure she will only tell us the good stuff!! ha.
i miss you all and am counting down the days .. with my torn up feelings... it is a hard thing to have to leave here for i feel for the first time in along time that i belong but it will be good to be home with all of you that i love.
have some fun today. put the fire on and the coffee pot.. and i would like bread pudding with milk just like in the olden days for supper.. i will let you in on the stories - if they are worth hearing!
all my love.. will see you kids in 9!!days.. wowo.
love mom, me, deb...
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